The Truth Comforts in Sorrow
Anniversaries are such a wonderful time of celebrating a vow, a milestone in a relationship. The anniversaries can be celebrated with cards, a special meal, and on some major years, maybe even a trip or a cruise. This makes sense after all, since the commitment is to love and to cherish until death separates us. But what happens when the unthinkable does happen... that is that death does separate us? The anniversaries don’t stop. The memories don’t stop. The feelings don’t stop. This is when, I believe, the believer is better equipped to handle things. I am not saying we don’t grieve, but as the scriptures say, we don’t grieve as one without hope. When the loved one that has passed is a believer in Jesus Christ, we can be assured that they are no longer suffering... and that God is with us. This means that we don’t grieve for them, but we still experience the loss. It is a time to ask God for strength to deal with the emotions that tend to be a little more raw at this time. It is time to celebrate the years we had been given and maybe reminisce, sometimes comforted by being with those we love. That is something that the friends and family should keep on their calendar to ask if this individual would enjoy their company on this day, or if it was a day they wanted to walk through privately on their own. Sometimes the temptation is to try to distract the person from those memories or redirect with other things. My experience with such loss is that this person may find healing in being able to share in the stories and memories of years gone by. I’ve known of people that marry quickly after the loss of a spouse, but even in those situations, the memories of that love do not disappear. This is good to be remembered by the one that has remarried, for how he/she will react to their current situation. It is also important to be remembered by the one who married them, that they don’t take offense or become jealous over mourning the loss of this past relationship. We must also note that everyone is different. Some will express their feelings and some deal with it internally. Some will break down while others will seem unfazed. One size doesn’t fit all. Pray for them on these days. Ask if they would like company. Love them. Father, we lift up all those that have lost loved ones and continue to mourn the loss. Fill them with Your peace today. Amen